I'd like for anyone and everyone who reads this blog to help me with a small, yet significant, survey.
Please answer the following question:
Do you think chivalry is dead?
also...
If so, who killed it? Women or men?
Thanks!
Can't wait to read what you think.
7 comments:
ooooo
I don't think its dead its dead in most of the guys but there are the few that still keep it alive.
And who killed it its a combonation of both the guys trying to get out of line killed it and the girls that couldn't appreciate the guy that did it with a sincere heart its there but you just have to find it.
haha.
so, some people can argue that chilvary can be oppressive to women because it leaves women at the sole power of men (i.e. only getting into the car until the man allows, only going where the man leads, etc...). ALthough, i think it can have its limits. Now personally, i like it - to some extent. After a while, im like: "dude, i can open my own door." I know i know, trying to be nice... but what if I want to be nice to the man? But chilvary could have very well been constructed by the male leaders of society a while back, trying to make it seem like chilvary was a 'good' thing when really, it was to keep their power over the women (we're talking the early days way before the women's suffurage movement).
Chilvary is a good and nice thing. But when this idea is taken into every single action both in and out of the car and house though, like with ideas and this idea of 'don't do anything until i do this or that first,' is where I'll say chilvary should be dead. It can easily feed the male ego of power over women, or, your gf/wife. And the truth is that as good as our intentions may be, the direct effects a lot of times are way different, even if we didn't 'mean' it.
Im not saying that women should be 'over' men... but 'equal.' If that's too hard for the male ego to handle, then, chilvary needs to remail alive for THEIR sake, because it makes THEM feel good about themself. Isn't this a selfish act then? Then again, when do i do selfless acts? Is that even possible...? Is it possible for me to do an act that gives me absolutely no positive reward? I thought i'd done that before, but really, at the very least, it makes me 'feel good,' or 'better,' about my self, or the world. hence, NOT self-less.
Just throwin' that out there.
now, if its dead: No, i think it's still alive. its just 'sick.'
haha.
maybe on bed rest...
jk.
do i like chilvary though? yes. As long as it is established that I do not mind opening my door from time to time, and that i will have as much of a say with any issue/conversation as the male 'partner' has.
it sounds silly... but thinking about it, these effects of chilvary can very well be true - even when the perpetuators themselves don't even realise it.
p.s.
guess who this is.
Let me take a wild stab at it....Damaris? :)
Good insights!
Not trying to offend anyone here....just trying to speak my mind and if anyone is offended by my comment, I apologize in advanced.
To me, chivalry has nothing to do with men overpowering women. It's that kind of thinking or mentality that makes chivalry dead...
Chivalry used to meant being courteous to women and being gallant, but like it was mentioned in another comment, women nowadays wanted to be treated "Equal". So it's hard for guys to realize that ladies do want to be treated like princesses.
A lot of ladies don't realize this but men are facing double standards. It's only a nice thing when they feel like it, until they feel like "dude, I can open my own doors".
Women need to realize that chivalry does not lessen women's strength or independence, and it's up to women to show that they want this treatment.
However, chivalry should not be one sided, which means that a woman can also take the initiative and do something chivalrous. Since women stress so much over equality, chivalry is a two-way street, it shouldn't be taken for a ride.
To the guys, it's important to know who deserves your kindness. Chivalry isn't about getting things in return, it's about being recognized to a degree for your actions and knowing that the person you are with will also treat you right. If they are all about taking advantage of your kindness then they do not deserve your chivalrous.
After all...to me, chivalry means being kind and courteous to anyone, regardless of if we are romantically interested in them or not. This means helping the old man cross the street, or picking up a folder full of documents dropped by a co-worker. I quoted this from another article, "Because common courtesy doesn't exist as much anymore, it makes us suspicious when we do receive kind gestures from others, and we assume kindness is part of someone's ulterior motives." Now isn't that true?
So going back to my point, being truly chivalrous means there is no motives behind it.....it's just simply being kind....so please don't take it the wrong way for that does kill the whole idea of being truly chivalrous.
Anyways...to answer your survey question...
No, chivalry is not dead...but it's on life support...and no one really "killed it" it just started to died out in time as society and mentalities changes.
Final conclusion...chivalry should be nourished and cherished by both men and women.
i agree... chilvary is not a one-sided thing. And that, i think, was what i was trying to get through that whole 'testament.' Although its on 'life support,' it is important that the 'doners' for chilvary to remain alive is found in both males and females.
Let's enjoy being 'chilvarised'... (yeah, i just made that word up i think!!)
Thanks, anonymous!
WOW!! THIS HAS BEEN A HEATED CONVERSATION!! CONCLUSION...LET'S JUST ALL RESPECT EACH OTHER AND BE KIND AND LOVING WHILE HAVING OUR HEARTS IN THE RIGHT PLACE :)
OH!! I DON'T THINK IT'S DEAD..THOUGH A LOT WEAKER!! I DON'T THINK WE COULD EVERY SAY IT'S DEAD, BECUASE EVEN IF ONE PERSON IS CHIVALROUS..THEN IT WOULD STILL BE ALIVE!!
I THINK NOTH PARTIES COULD BE TOO PLACE! MAYBE EVEN MORE WOMEN WHO STARTED TO BECOME A LOT EASIER AND GUYS THOUGHT..."WHY BOTHER"...I'M A WOMEN BY THE WAY...
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